Tuesday, April 28, 2009

More pain

Last night I woke up with the worst sore pain in my breasts.  They are as hard a rocks.  Heavy.  I'm pretty sure my milk has come in.  Milk for Lydia that she may never drink.  Milk that I might have to pump to then discard.  Why do I have to endure this horror.  Hasn't my body betrayed me enough.  Why torture me with her milk when you killed her??????

The info from the hospital says to put cold cabbage leaves in my bra.  WTF!  My husband as put aside some ice packs for me instead.  The paper says this may last a week.  I do not understand.  I do not want to.   

24 comments:

k-mart said...

I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say but that you are in my thoughts. I can't imagine what you are going through. Sending you many hugs.

CJ said...

I am so sorry for you loss. I did not read your blog until today from Busted Babymaker's. I am truly sorry.

O.S.B. said...

I'm so so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I know the cabbage thing sounds crazy, but, it really does help and work.

(((Hugs)))

Candace said...

I am soooo sorry for this additional pain. I am praying for you my dear. As for the cabbage leaves... do it, it really does work. Much love, Candace

loribeth said...

I am so sorry. :(

I personally did not have a problem with my breasts after delivery -- but I know several bereaved moms who did, and who swear by the cabbage leaves! Really!! Give it a try!

Echloe said...

Can anyone tell me what LCFA is? I've noticed a lot of postings from this. Thank you. And I guess I will try the cabbage.

janessa said...

Hey, I have ice packs that are all prepped for boobs (round, hole in the middle, blah, blah, blah). Lemme know if you want them. I've heard the engorgement lasts for 3 days. Don't pump, it will only encourage more milk :(

You're still on my mind. If you need anything, just say the word. I'm so sorry.

Melody said...

I'm so sorry! You are in my prayers!

Infertility is Hard said...

I am so very sorry for your loss. I cannot even imagine what you are going through, but please know that there are complete strangers such as myself praying for you.

Melissia said...

If you will go to the Glow in the Woods website there is information about the best way to deal with breast engorgement because your milk has come in (just look in the sidebar), and the cold cabbage leaves do work, as well as a tight bra and some pain meds if you have them if not then tylenol as often as you can.
Again, I am so sorry that you need this information.

Busted said...

I'm so sorry. I wasn't told about the cabbage leaves, just instructed to wear a VERY tight bra and to avoid excess hot water. I got a sports bra that I wore all the time, and mine stopped within a few days without needing to pump or anything. Thinking of you, please let me know if you need anything or just want someone to talk to.

B MoM said...

LFCA is a blog which you can find here:
http://lostandfoundandconnectionsabound.blogspot.com/2009/04/369th-issue-of-lfca.html

I hope you dont mind but I posted your news so that others can read about it and send you some support.

This is the most difficult thing you'll ever have to endure and I hate that you had to go through it and are going through it now. There are MANY others who have been your shoes. Perhaps you'll come across someone else who understsands your pain exactly b/c they've experienced it exactly.

Bella said...

Oh sweetie, how awful you have to deal with that on top of this tragic loss. I am so, so sorry. I am praying of and praying for you. ((HUGS))

Katie said...

I am so, so sorry. This is not fair and my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Rose's Daughter said...

I'm sorry that you are dealing with on top of everything else. hang in there sweetie, we are all praying for you.

L.A. Mommy said...

Bets,

I'm at a loss as to what to say. The only thing I can say is that I'm sooo sorry. Please know that we're all praying for you and that if you need anything, all you have to do is ask.

{{HUGS}}

JW Moxie said...

I am thinking of you and keeping you and your husband in my prayers.

Anonymous said...

Oh honey I am so sorry you are going through all this, I wish I could make it go away.

Anonymous said...

I was heartbroken to read your news on the bump. I'm so sorry for your loss and just cannot fathom the pain you must be enduring now. I've been thinking of you and your family ever since. All my good thoughts and prayers go out to you.

M said...

I'm so very sorry. I remember how angry I was when my milk came in... It's like, this you get right? Nothing else, but this you can do?? I echo the others with tight sportsbra, don't pump because that will just create more... Supply & demand and all that. It's horribly uncomfortable, but it does go away within a week or two.

Again, I wish there were words to express how sad this is. My thoughts are with you.

We have Angel Wings said...

Oh honey. I am so sorry. I don't know what to say and I know that there are no words to take your pain away. Please know that I'm thinking of you.

All my love,

Tarah

Beth said...

((HUGS)) ((HUGS)) and more ((HUGS))

Tracey said...

Its just a cruel thing when your milk comes in..I'm so sorry you are going through this. What worked for me was wearing THREE tight (think sports bras) all the time for about 4-5 days. I didn't do the cabbage leaves route - just the tight bras and constriction dried up my milk quickly.

Tylenol and lots of rest for you.

I'm so very sorry, you are in my prayers.

Paz said...

There are no words. Love and hugs to you.

Questioning everything, could have's, what if's is normal, just be gentle on yourself.

HUGS