Monday, September 15, 2008

More To Think About

O.K. so it is as my husband described it.  My RE said that there is stage 3 endometriosis mostly behind my uterus and tubes, and she couldn't really clean that up.  She did remove a ton of scar tissue that she found on my uterus and around that area.  And my tubes are open and functional.  However,........ the endo tissue is restricting movement of the fimbriae of my tubes and that could prevent them from catching a newly released egg.  So IVF is our best option.  IVF! I'm ready for this.  My husband is ready for this.  We are ready to shell out thousands of dollars that we have been saving away and we are ready for the drugs, and multiple doctor visits.  Our parents our supporting this new turn.  But there is one thing that I'm afraid of.  One thing thing that is holding me back.  

What happens to any extra embryos that aren't inserted?  There is no way that I would kill them.  But could we keep them on ice forever?  Now I know at this point this is just speculation because I haven't even started the process yet and may not even get any fertilized embryos.  My husband thinks I've stepped into crazy Catholisism here.  We are both Catholic and go to church semi-regularly.  And I don't follow all of the church's beliefs.  But I do believe that life begins at conception.  Even if it does happen in a petri dish.  And any little embryos that are created in that dish would be our children.  So I would not allow them to be destroyed.  We talked about saving them for later on for future children.  But I've read about some women having upwards of 9 frozen embryos.  To reiterate, I know that it is silly to think of this stuff now.  That I may not even end up with a lot of embryos, or I might use them up just to get pregnant with one healthy child.  Who knows.  We are still only just starting to talk about this stuff.  

I go in this afternoon to have the balloon removed from my uterus.  Hopefully things are healing o.k. in there.  I started acupuncture again just as an extra help.  I really couldn't deal with any more scar tissue problems.  And I have an eight week protocol of estradiol/prometrium, estradiol/prometrium.  And a saline sonogram to check the lining of the uterus and to break up any new adhesions that may form.  After that we will resume treatments.  So it is back to waiting around.  But at least we can take the time to really think things through. 

3 comments:

alicia said...

wow what a hard decision! But I am excited for you that you are starting this new process and journey! If you have extra embies can you donate them to other couples who can't have children? Or could you just keep them on ice for the next go round? I think there are alot of options I am sure your Dr will talk to you about them all!

Just Me said...

Its OK... your "mom" instincts will tell you what to do with them. Maybe donation to other couples? You could save them till you are done having kids (after one or two)

GL!!! You will make the right decision.

t.bird said...

we ended up with 9 on ice- and we've used almost all of them- feel bad that they never got a chance :(
ahhh well- they're with Jesus :)

good luck with IVF!